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If Political Parties were cars

Comparing SA political parties to cars

Or perhaps I should just say I am comparing them to vehicles or beter still, modes of transportation. You see, some of them move faster and more dangerously than others. On the other hand, if some were going any slower they would be reversing.

ANC

The ANC as a big red double decker bus. It might not be red any longer, but painted in the colors of the national flag. In fact, I’m sure it was repainted. Anyway, the driver is not always in his seat and steering is left to auto pilot. He goes upstairs to look for a way to steer from up above.

The bus is filled with teenagers from the youth league and ladies from the women’s league and very few white faces. It is moving rather slow and smoking heavily causing pollution and costing a fortune in fuel and oil. Sometimes it breaks down and some of the passengers get of to get on the next vehicle. The breakdown is never their fault.

DP

The DP is a Mercedes Benz, manufactured in Germany. Definitely not the latest model, rather the box shape of a couple of years ago. It has a proven track record though, always going at a steady pace. It is all white with a black vinyl top. This car is regularly serviced. The tow bar is only sometimes in use to hook a trailer which seems to go missing without any prior warning.

EFF

This is definitely a High Ace Taxi with no exhaust pipe, making a hell of a noise when it is moving, which is not all the time. To keep up the noise even when it’s standing still, there is a loud haler fitted on top. The number plates are false, the unlicensed driver is using a spanner to steer, as the steering wheel was lost somewhere. All passengers are fitted with free headgear. Being a pirate taxi, none of the passengers are sure where or when the next turn will be.

AGANG SA

This party would surely be a Penny-farthing bicycle. It’s difficult to get going, challenging to steer and falls over very easily, all because of the big front wheel with only a tiny wheel to follow. Sometimes the driver is one foot on the bike and one foot on a trailer pulled by a Mercedes.

Some of the other vehicles would be an ox-wagon, a Tata without a spare wheel and a Datsun LDV among others. How do you see it?